2 Year Gold Pin

stickpinstartn.jpg   I received my 2 year anniversary pin at work last week, and for some reason things appear different somehow with me and my job.  I can’t believe I made it this far.

My two years working in a call centre Customer Service department has been a topsy turvy struggle, especially after returning to the workforce after nine years of illness.  The customers are very demanding to deal with at times and frankly they test my patience.  I wrote my “Brown Bagging It” series on the hunt for a job; and in hindsight, that was the uncomplicated part.  One of the chief obstacles was stigma in the workplace; for I lived in major anxiety of anyone finding out my secret living with a mental illness, yet at times I wished they were aware of my struggle each day.

Throughout the course of the two years, there were road blocks; a department reshuffle requiring training (a major challenge and upset due to a new computer system), adjusting to two new managers (one was fired), and now another reshuffle.  I do have problems coping at times, but it is now that I begin to feel differently as far as the mental illness issue is concerned.

I sense as if at the two year mark, that I’ve made my mark and shown the company that I am someone trustworthy, dependable and can handle what is thrown my way.  I will not holler from the rooftops that I have major depression, however, if word does leak out I feel now I will not fall to pieces.  And really, why should this illness be such a secret?  I did nothing wrong.  I know though, I would never disclose that I see a psychiatrist; my years spent in hospitals/institutions, ECT treatments, or tucked away in seclusion on suicide watch.  The general public will never grasp this; there will always be mental illness stigma. 

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2 thoughts on “2 Year Gold Pin

  1. I most certainly can understand, and I cheer for you, and your success!

    You know, there is no worse condition than silence…

    best wishes, always,
    x,Will.

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