Welcome – Glad you could join me



STIGMA: definitition:  a set of negative and often unfair beliefs that a society or group of people have about something

This site Living In Stigma is dedicated to those individuals living with mental illness, affecting them most deeply along with their spouses, family and friends.

Many forms of mental illness take their shape in Depression, Bipolar Disorder, Schizophrenia and other disorders including Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia just to name a few.  A major note is that mental illness is neither one’s fault nor a character flaw, however, we unfortunately  live in a society laced with Stigma.

Gambling Habits & Personality Disorders

The treatment of people who cannot keep their gambling habits in check is often complicated because they also tend to suffer from personality disorders. So says Meredith Brown of Monash University in Australia, in a review in Springer’s Journal of Gambling Studies.

Problem gambling creates a multitude of intrapersonal, interpersonal and social difficulties for the roughly 2.3 percent of the population internationally that suffers from this behavior. Previous research has shown that people with gambling problems suffer from a range of psychiatric disorders affecting their mood, levels of anxiety and their use of substances.

Brown and her colleagues reviewed existing research to establish patterns and factors that link problem gambling and various personality disorders. They found that people with gambling problems share similar characteristics to people with antisocial, borderline, histrionic and narcissistic personality disorders. In particular, Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is found more among people with gambling problems than those who can control their gambling. This personality disorder is associated with unstable interpersonal relationships and self-image, and marked impulsivity.

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Image source:  www.inspiremalibu.com


Seeing it through the abuser’s point of view: the world of estranged parent forums

Originally posted on Made of Moxie:

boundaries2Talked with my sister quite a bit about my mom yesterday, and discovered she still fantasizes about a ‘reconciliation’ with me — in her mind, it’s only a question of when — and she even had planned to overlap my visit to her (my sister just had heart surgery and is supposed to avoid all stress) so we could ‘have our reconciliation,’ and then my friend sent me this ASTOUNDING in-depth look at abusive parents on forums: Down the Rabbit Hole: The World of Estranged Parent Forums.

She worried it would be triggering but sent it on because the people on the forums sounded so much like my mother. I’m glad she did. I probably should have waited?

Because now I’m in the position of being grateful that my mother hasn’t shown up on my lawn with six co-conspirators to berate be for hours and that she took my…

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Using Bipolar Disorder to Pump Up TV Ratings?

Yep, that was a portion of the storyline on last week’s TV episode of ABC’s “Secret’s and Lies”.  So much for trying to educate society about mental illness to prevent stigma, this just takes us down one more peg to get TV ratings. Sad.

Without describing too much of the story line, it was the episode prior to this week’s finale, and the main character, Ben, is found snooping around in the dresser drawer of the woman he had an affair with, and finds two bottles of her pills.

One of the bottles contains lithium, and the other is an anti-psychotic. He looks up both and discovers they are for “Bipolar Disorder”; afterwards showing the woman exhibiting signs of “flipping out” and becomes violent towards Ben.

In my opinion, they could have worked that storyline another way without including the woman going berserk.

“Secret and Lies” TV source IMDB.com


Take My Hand

Originally posted on The Petite:

Take My Hand

I know you are weak my friend,

I am too.

I know you’re broken,

I’ve been there too.

But for now let’s just live.

Have a day.

Shower yourself with care and kindness,

one you’ve been saving for others.

The morrow wouldn’t be so bad, trust me.

You can scream, you can cry or you can write

either way you’d wake up to a better light.

Now smile and keep your head high,

for I’m here with you

we’ll go through even the highest tide.

Together may be we’d understand

the beauty of life

and may be one day

we’d even dance.

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When Your Abuser or Estranged Relative Dies ~ The Whole Funeral Thing

My toxic mother is not in the picture anymore, but the question still remains, what about the funeral? The response would be ~ NO for my abuser if he were still alive.

Searching high and low for a detailed answer, I came across this well written post. My intention is not to shove religion down your throats believe me, as this article was written by a minister on a religious site, however, it answered my questions and more.

One of the biggest dilemmas faced by escapees from abusive families is what to do when our abuser or estranged relative dies. Should we make an appearance at the wake and funeral, or not? Should we go to the burial?  Should we send flowers? Should we offer our condolences- and if so, to whom?

To the very people who took our abuser’s side against us or shunned us from their family?  What kind of an act will we have to put on if people offer condolences to US?  How will we be able to pretend that the death of our abuser was a great loss, when we can’t even come up with one nice thing to say about him?

See the remainder of this article at:



Borderline Personality Disorder as disabling as Bipolar Disorder

People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) tend to suffer similar deterioration of their psychiatric and physical health as those with bipolar disorder, according to new research published in the British Journal of Psychiatry.

“Despite the clinical and public health significance of both of these disorders, it sometimes seems as if BPD lives in the shadow of bipolar disorder,” said researcher Mark Zimmerman, M.D., director of outpatient psychiatry at Rhode Island Hospital.

Bipolar disorder is a widely researched, well-publicized, well-funded topic. By contrast, BPD is seldom discussed and it is not included in the Global Burden of Disease study, a comprehensive registry that quantifies diseases by cost, mortality, geography, risk, and other factors.

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image source: positivemed.com


Considering Couples Therapy? Here are 7 signs….

My husband and I have been married for over thirty years, and it was suggested that we do some couple’s counselling just to talk over some issues and have a third party to oversee each of our points of view.  It really made a difference with only 6 sessions.  

Fixing a relationship with therapy doesn’t necessarily mean it’s broken, it’s just maintenance!

Maintaining a happy long-term relationship isn’t easy. And when the going gets tough, the tough sometimes need outside help. Couples counseling isn’t a last-ditch effort to save a broken partnership. It’s a healthy form of relationship upkeep.

Keep reading for 7 totally normal signs you need couples therapy, and find out how you and your partner can start rebuilding intimacy on your own.

See more on this article on PsychCentral:

Am I using too many Tags?

I was wondering about this as I was posting an article, am I using too many tags? So I looked on WordPress ‘help’, with them stating, “Five to 15 tags (or categories, or a combination of the two) is a good number to add to each of your posts. “The more categories you use, the less likely it is that your post will be selected for inclusion in the topic listings”.

Some postings out there have about 20-40 tags with no particular topic, are people aware of this?  Do you find it makes a difference?

This is WP Help on Tags
Topic Listings

Your posts will appear in the topic listings of any tags or categories you use. Therefore, assigning tags and categories to your post increases the chance that other WordPress.com users will see your content.

However, you don’t want irrelevant content showing up on the topic listings or search, and neither do we. That’s why we limit the number of tags and categories that can be used on a public tag listing.  The more categories you use, the less likely it is that your post will be selected for inclusion in the topic listings. Learn more about Topics here.

Mental Illness Affects Spouses, Families & Friends

I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. There is BP I, where moods can swing from very low (depression) to very high (mania). My disorder is BPII, meaning I still experience ‘depression’; however, the ‘high’ (mania) is lesser of a degree and therefore named ‘hypomania’.

For a decade, I literally “lived” in and out of hospitals. My husband stood by me through these turbulent years. Years of endless hospitalizations, electro-convulsive therapy (shock treatments), suicide attempts and a myriad of medications became a way of life.

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PTSD ~ Symptoms & Treatments

I have PTSD, and through therapy I’ve begun to heal from the trauma I suffered as a child who was sexually abused.  It takes time to recognize how the symptoms listed below have affected my life, and it’s taken years with a qualified therapist to work through and cope with the intrusive memories.


(newsmax.com/health) — Are you unable to overcome traumatic experiences that happened in the past? Do you have troubled sleep and a constant feeling of fear and anxiety? Depression, anxiety, and panic are some of the first symptoms that show in post-traumatic stress disorder.

PTSD is common in the U.S. among firefighters, combat warriors, and adolescents. Post-traumatic stress disorder develops when panic and anxiety after a traumatic incident are not sorted out even after the tragic incident is over.  Instead, the sense of panic and anxiety continues for many months or years of having witnessed the tragic incident.  In such cases, depression and symptoms of post traumatic stress disorder or PTSD begin to appear.

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